This is from the complete plays of the Humana Festival '99. It reminds me of how I write and how I wish I could write and...it makes me smile each and every time I read it. It's a "phone play" so it's meant to be listened to like an over-heard phone conversation. So, yeah...read it, okay? :)

Speech Therapy by Rebecca Gilman
PETER: Well, I ran into Mary and she introduced me to that visiting professor from NYU and it turns out he's doing research on swallowing disorders.
LISA: Oh, yeah?
PETER: Yeah. And I told him that you're a speech therapist, but I said, "My girlfriend's a speech therapist," and he said, "'Girlfriend?' Isn't that a bit archaic? Isn't it a bit, infantalizing?" You know. And, I though, this is always going to be a problem. I know I'm not supposed to say "girlfriend," because it's not p.c. or whatever, but I just can't bring myself to call you my "partner."
LISA: I know. It sounds like we're filing articles of incorporation or something.
PETER: Exactly, but then, you know, what else is there? "Lover?" Every time somebody introduces me to their "lover" I just...I wince.
LISA: I immediately picture them having sex. Which is not always...exactly...appetizing
PETER: It just...it functionalizes the relationship. Like that's all you do. Like the person just comes over for an hour every night and you have sex and then they leave
LISA: Like a service contract.
PETER: Right, so I was expaining the dilemma we have, and Mary suggested "significant other," but I have real problems with that too.
LISA: It's too cute.
PETER: It's cute, and also, it's wrong.
LISA: Wrong how?
PETER: It's the "other" part. To me, it just...it differentiates you too much. I mean, of course you're your own person, as they say, but I still don't think of you as completely other than me. You know? Because I think of you as part of me too. As someone who is very much a part of me and very much informs me. (Beat.) So, to me, it would be very false to say you're my significant other because really, you're my significant other who is also a very significant part of me (Beat.) And that's just...you know...too long to say.
LISA: You could make it an acronym. Significant other who...SOW...is also a...SOWIAA...also a very...SOWIAV...significant part of me. SPOM. SOWIAVSPOM.
(Small beat.)
PETER: I'm trying to say something serious here.
LISA: I'm sorry.
PETER: No, it's...I mean we talk about this like this but...(He trails off.) It's okay. Just listen, okay?
LISA: Okay.
PETER: I left those guys and I was walking back to my office and thinking about it, and I was thinking that I don't want to worry about how to refer to you. You know? I don't want you to be off somewhere where I'm having to refer to you all the time. I want you to be with me. I love you and I want us to be together and I want you to be my...my SOWIAVSPOM forever. (Small beat.) So I'm...what I'm asking is will you marry me? Will you let me call you my wife? (Pause. She doesn't answer) Lisa?
LISA: I'm sorry. I just...I was having a little swallowing disorder of my own there.
PETER: Oh.
(Beat.)
LISA: Peter?
PETER: Yes?
(Small beat.)
LISA: Yes.

END OF PLAY