Last Winter by Cinderbella
Note: This fiction is like one of those fics which doesn’t actually have a storyline, but discusses stuff that happened in the past. A lot of people have done that with the original 8 episodes, so I decided to it for a small bit of one of Estee and Harmony’s new episodes. The timing.. is unclear and not really relevant. Although, it probably happens at some point during Junior Year (all you have to know is that Gwen knows about Jake and.. there is certainly a suggestion that Scout and Jill have broken up). Other than that, nothing really happens. It is a pointless fic, but whenever I write fic I always want to include into it things that have happened in New Beginnings, and never really got a chance to. Plus, I love writing Jill. It’s short. So, read…
The dining hall was relatively empty and Hamilton easily spotted Jake, already seated on her own at one of the tables. He grabbed a tray, and made his way towards her. As he approached, he watched her - with a slightly dazed, pained look on her face, seemingly staring into space.
"Morning," he said, sliding onto a chair. Jake’s expression didn’t change, and she didn’t acknowledge his presence.
"Hello… earth to Jake…"
She shook her head, snapping out of it.
"Yeah, hey. Are you ok?"
"Uh.. yeah. Yeah."
"Ok, I’m not convinced."
Jake smiled. "No, seriously. I’m fine. Just, uh…" Her smile dropped momentarily. "Re-living some moments..."
"Oh, nothing," she said, taking a mouthful of cold toast. Hamilton looked at her, again unconvinced. "At least, nothing I really want to discuss in the dining hall.."
Jake looked around, indicating towards the other guys, slowly filling the room.
"Are you sure?" Hamilton stared at her, intensely.
"God, yes. So.. did you finish your history paper? I’m still struggling with my Chemistry…" She paused, and continued a little quieter. "Stop looking at me like that.."
"Like.. like.. never mind.." she finished her toast, and indicated for him to hurry up. "Come on, we’re going to be late."
Gwen hit the play button on the stereo, and smiled to herself as Jill turned slightly under the covers of her bed, wincing.
"Good morning Jillian, it’s, like, 8:30 already.."
"Huh? Oh, right. School. Class." She sat herself up. "Have you had breakfast already?"
"Yeah, I went down earlier."
"Did you see anyone….?"
"Did I see Scout? No. I did see Jake though. I didn’t sit with her.." Jill smiled. ".. because she was looking all.. weird.."
Jill climbed out of bed, and headed towards the bathroom.
"I better talk to her about that, then…" she winked.
Jake’s fingers lightly tapped at the keys on her laptop. The door opened behind her, as Hamilton entered the room.
"Hey," he said, dropping his bag next to the door, and closing it.
"I have no classes this afternoon…" he smiled, sitting down on her bed.
"Me either," she replied, staring at her computer screen.
"Yeah. Hamilton, we have the same classes today. The same teachers."
"Oh right. Sometimes I just love my Dad for sending them all away on these conferences.."
"Mmm," Jake replied, typing a sentence and pressing the enter key. Ham stood up, and leaned over her shoulder.
"What are you doing?" he lightly kissed her cheek, before turning back to the laptop.
Jake typed something else, before answering.
"IMing Jill?! Oh, man…"
"How do you manage to keep two of these conversation boxy thingys going at the same time? I’ve never even used this thing…"
"It’s called multi-tasking, Ham. It’s a girl thing."
"It’s scientifically proven. Girls can do more things at once, whereas guys can’t."
Hamilton smiled playfully, moving back towards her bed. "What about girls pretending to be guys?"
Jake turned back towards the screen. "I’ll just sign-off. Jill’s being annoying anyway…"
Jake pulled down her laptop, and turned to face him.
"No… apparently Gwen saw me this morning and thought I was looking upset…"
"So, I wasn’t the only one?"
Jake ignored his comment, continuing. "So, she told Jill who is now worried about me, for no reason whatsoever…"
"No reason, at all?"
"Look, Jake. I don’t want to push this, but.. I know you. And you have an uncanny way of not telling people when you’re upset about something.. which lets it just get worse and worse…" Jake sighed.
"Last winter," she got up, and walked to sit next to Hamilton.
"When I said I was re-living moments.. well, I was re-living stuff from last winter."
"Like, good stuff?"
She leaned her head on his shoulder.
"Or not…" he took her hand.
"That was all. Nothing new.
Nothing special. Just, you know, I do that sometimes. I start thinking about
something.. and it leads to another.."
"Everything." Jake picked up her head, and looked at Hamilton.
"God, I did not bring this up so you would apologise for doing something in the past. I mean, if that’s what you’re referring to…"
"I did a lot of stupid things last fall.."
"The whole on-pause thing was my idea, though."
"Yeah, but the worst part for me, was the knowing that it was all my fault. And, there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I remember telling Will how much I needed you, and yet…"
"I lied to you to, though."
"I told you that I didn’t love you…"
"I remember. You said ‘You want me to stop loving you? Fine.’" Jake winced slightly at the memory. "And, I had been drowning my sorrows…"
"That was probably the worst moment of my life. I mean, I’ve had to say goodbye to you before.. like, this summer. That was really hard. But, at least then, I knew we would be back together. That we were together…"
"Didn’t you think we would get back together, last year? We hadn’t broken up, as such."
"After you left my room that day.. I don’t know what I thought. I just cried. I remember watching out of my window, as you walked part of the way home."
"It felt like goodbye?"
"Well, goodbye to what we were."
"Like.. the end of an era?"
Jake smiled. "I guess you could say that. In retrospect, I think it’s what we needed.. to mature. That’s what I was thinking about this morning. It hurt at the time.. it was hard to forgive you, but I did. So, there was no need to apologise just now. I just.. it sucked but.. it made us.. what we are now."
As she spoke, she has looked down at the floor. Hamilton took her chin, and tilted her head towards him.
"I never stopped loving you throughout any of it."
"I know," she said, lightly kissing him. He pulled away, slightly.
"And.. if possible, I love you more, now."
"I know…" she said kissing him again. This time, rather than pulling away, he cupped his face in her hands, and didn’t let go.
So, there you have it. My little time-filler in between waiting for the new Junior Year episode ;) and studying for exams….